WHAT KIND OF FRIENDS DO YOU HAVE?
In 2 Samuel 13:3 we read, "But Amnon had a friend, whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shimeah David's brother; And Jonadab was a very subtle man." Friends are very important to us all. We like to have people we can talk to, to share things with, to do things together with and in which we can confide. Solomon well said, "A man that hath mends must show himself friendly; and there is friend that sticketh closer than a brother." (Proverbs 18:24).
The kind of friends we have determines our reputations. We are considered to have the same actions and attitudes they have. To closely associate with the loose and unethical crowd would cause many to say that is the way we are. Paul pointed out, "Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners." (I Corinthians 15:33). Other versions of the Bible render this that evil companions corrupt good morals. Indeed we will be influenced by those with whom we associate. As we think in our hearts so are we (Proverbs 23:7). We need to have good, ethical friends for the best to be brought out in us.
Amnon loved his half sister Tamar. He wanted to be with her but he could not figure out a way. Jonadab the shrewd and crafty friend told him just how to get her in his house. He was to pretend sickness and when David, his father, visited him request that Tamar be sent to cook for him. This he did- the result of which Tamar baked him some cakes of bread which he insisted she feed to him. This put her in his bedroom and he raped the poor girl. He then forced her to leave his house. She went to her full brother Absalom who later found the occasion of having Amnon killed. Much misery came from the ploy Amnon's friend concocted. Many spend miserable lives because they chose the wrong friends with which to associate and let themselves be influenced by them. We are to associate with sinful people so we can teach them the truth. If we can help people out of the pit of sin we will be doing a good work. However, we must not ever be lowered to their evil way of living to try to help them out. You don't drink and party with the alcoholics to make them sober people. They need to be influenced by right standards of living rather than for us to be influenced by them in their evil ways.
Who would be some good friends for us to have?
l. God and Christ. Abraham was called the friend of God (James 2:23). The reason was his "faith wrought with his works, and by works was faith made perfect." (James 2:23). When we have a working faith with God we will be called the friends of God as well. Jesus said, "Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you." (John 15: 14). These friends are more important than any others. They stand by us in every trial that comes our way. "What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us." (Romans 8:31).
2. Good Christian Parents. Young people should make it a point to be good friends with their mothers and fathers. They love you and are doing their best to care for you. They see you are fed and clothed. They provide shelter for you. They help you to have a good education, and they encourage you to have good spiritual training. Christian parents read the Bible in the home and pray to God with their children. They worship with their brethren at the local congregation of the church and enjoy the company of those of like faith. This is so valuable to the lives of children and young people.
3. Christian friends of like interests. Some have Christian friends that enjoy wholesome recreation together. Hunting and fishing together makes for good comradeship. Some Christians enjoy retreats with one another where they enjoy recreation together and couple it with Bible seminars and classes. Some enjoy visiting the sick together. Some enjoy personal work together in studying the Bible with people. Good, wholesome activities together enrich our lives and build up our faith.
4. A Christian Companion for life. For a man a good Christian wife is a wonderful asset. "Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord." (Proverbs 18:22). Good wives are "discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands." They love their own husbands and they love their children. (Titus 2:4, 5). Discreet means wise. Blessed is the man who has a good manager as a wife. Blessed is the man who has a wife who is pure in heart and life. Blessed is the man who has a wife who loves her home and keeps it to the best of her ability. Blessed is the man who has a wife who loves the Lord and doesn't want their prayers to be hindered (I Peter 3:7). For a woman a good Christian husband is a wonderful asset. This is a man who loves his wife as his own body (Ephesians 5:25-28). He would never knowingly do anything that would hurt her, abuse her, or discourage her in the faith. He would do his best to provide for his own by making a living through much hard work. He would seek to advance himself within rightful limits for his family's sake. The wife would be his lover and his friend for life. He would be faithful to God, a student of Bible and a man of prayer.
Seek good friends. They will help you through life.